Thursday, June 23, 2011

Greetings Dear Birthday, I've Been Expecting You

35

Old enough to be present, young enough to be only 1 box beneath the 18 year olds in the age demographic questions.

1/2 way to 70, does that mean I am middle age?

Looking back on my life, I realize that there are a lot of places I expected to be by this point. Some places I have visited. Some I have decided against dabbling in entirely. Some I am still waiting to manifest, and still some I thoroughly regret.

Regrets, yes, I have a few.

But after losing my Iphone this week and getting over my initial upset I began to think a little more clearly. My life is starting again. But this time I have a cheat sheet. I am older, wiser yet still young enough to enjoy youth.

I don't have to spend another moment of my life wondering if a guy I like will call.
The man I love sleeps next to me every night.

I don't have to wonder what my kids will look like.
I can see my son's face everyday.

My future is still a little uncertain, but it has narrowed. The things I have wanted and things I have tolerated have come into focus. I have lost a lot of people, and a lot of things to get here. Some I miss, and some I realize, I should not have in my life.

The little girl who was so unsure, uneasy, and insecure, she only comes around every once in a while. Usually when a buffet of hormones create a wafting scent she can't pass up.

Life is going to get better my friends. I have seen the lowest of lows, and have steadily climbed out of my rut. No bitching and moaning, I am a woman of action.

Here's to life beginning again. Here is to life heading in a promising direction and taking all of my loved ones with me. Success is closer than I can even imagine.

0 comments: